Treat on a Tuesday

Another note/draft- sorry for all the words

7.1.2017
God, you always teach me all my lessons and give me all my clarity while I'm running. That's how it's always been and always will be, isn't it? Keeping me in shape in more ways than one.

So God got me today. I ran for the first time in a long time and after one of the most hellish [HELLISH] months I have ever had. But He gave me this nudge to go run; I thought it was just me wanting to be healthy after having a stomach bug, but I should have known better. So I start running, and I'm thinking, yeah I was made for this run because I have only been able to eat bread for the past 4 days- carbs galore letttsssss goooooo, and so I decided I was going to do 4 hills since I was feeling so up for the challenge. Now for those of you who don't live in Massachusetts, specifically western Mass, these are not some small-fry hills. There are HILLS out here. So I do 3, and I'm feeling pretty tired and almost whimp out on my 4th, when I got that nudge inside saying "just do it. You can do it. Just prove it to yourself." So I whipped around onto the next street really fast before I could change my mind. I start laughing to myself because this street was literally a monstrosity of a hill! So big I couldn't even find the top because, let me tell you, it was NO WHERE in sight. I had to laugh even harder because having faith in myself running this hill was about as mystifying as faith in God. But I found myself saying, God says believe in what you cannot see (it's okay, I laughed that that was even the phrase going through my head). So I kept climbing with Thomas Rhett's "Vacation" song blaring in my ears and he sings one line that says "I'm going to rehydrate while I dehydrate, you know what I'm sayin'? " and it just all the sudden snapped in me how, during this last month of crazy I have totally fallen away from God. I kept telling myself to relinquish control, but I didn't. I just kept doing things my way, not letting myself take breaks, being hard on myself, and quite frankly being average. That's all I am without God. Average. My grades in school reflect it, my relationships reflected it, how I have been feeling in general reflected it. Anyway, back to  my original point, I was reminded but the rehydrate and hydrate thing was the message I heard from Pastor Tyler before I left on all my traveling (go to Lifesongonline.org and check it out 6/11/2017). That particular message focused on how God is the living water and we are always salty (notes coming soon on this message). We dehydrate ourselves with everything around us, people, jobs, etc, and need to be rehydrating with Him to be above average, to make our mark, to be different in this crazy world. Mind you, I'm having all these thoughts while I'm running up over a mile high hill (yes, still running and not kidding about the climb) and let me just tell you now. I didn't make it to the top. I doubted, kind of, that there even was a top at one point. Really I gave up and didn't want to put the effort in to find the top anymore, but let me tell you how it went down. I know I sound crazy, but God was talking to me through this whole run and I got to this fork in the road and He said "go left." I look left and it's more uphill and in my head I said screw that. So I ran a little bit to the left, made a loop, then ultimately made my way down turning right. The whole time after I turned around I was thinking, you know, if you had just turned left, it probably would have just taken you back to the street you parked on, you just had to get through the hardest part. Then I thought, I WENT THROUGH 4 HARD PARTS BEFORE, WHY DO I NEED TO DO ANOTHER ONE?!? And then I was overwhelmed by two more whispers: "because I asked you to", and "because you know I will repay you in 10 fold". Dang it. 

More often then not, I like to think I am following God's directions. But today made it clear to me that I don't. A lot of the time, I let myself just do what I want. You know where turning right (my way) got me on my run today? 3 streets backwards from where I started. You know where left would have gotten me? 2 streets closer and a sweet view of the sunset. God always knows better. His journey is hard, you have to dig deep to find the energy and effort to get there, and odds are, you are not going to like the looks of it when you see the original challenge. But the result. Man. That's the good stuff. And to think you and I could miss it on something so much bigger than a running path but in a real life opportunity because you weren't listening or didn't feel like putting a little more effort in. Those are my word-thoughts today friends. I hope they resonated a little with you as they did with me.

Happy Tuesday, and don't give up! (Cheesy, I know, but just embrace it)

T. Hall

The Sweetest Sunday of All

So--- these are some drafts that have just been sitting in my blog folder.. some of the stuff was worth a read even a few months late so I decided to post them for my own benefit. Hopefully you all get a kick out of it too! Sorry again for them being unfinished... one of these days I'll get good at this. 

Hello friends! Just in case you were wondering, this is the sweetest Sunday of the year: Easter Sunday.

First let me talk about egg hunts. You gotta love 'em, right? It's colorful, it's fun, it's usually full of money and chocolate! All the things people love. Everywhere you look there are these little nuggets and prizes, you just have to put a little effort in, and it's all yours. Some are really easy to see, and others take a bit longer to find and reveal themselves. As I was thinking about this, I was thinking about what my personal "egg hunt" looks like. If I just put a little bit of effort in, God usually has a prize waiting for me to find. Some prizes are really easy to see and take hold of, but there are some that are a lot harder to see. If I just follow his clues, I find His surprises. Over the past year- first it was school (that was a hard one to find), now it's staying in school (grades, duh), but also opportunities with outreach, friends, leadership, and so much more. Sometimes it's something really small and obvious that God wants you to see- those are the eggs on the ground; other times the eggs are hidden so well, disguised even, that you miss them. That's the real bummer. BUT there was one gift that God made that was so big no one could miss it- He gave His one and only son to us and sacrificed Him to die for our sins so that we could live eternally with Him in heaven. And that is why the story of Easter is the greatest story ever told.

This Easter season I am just overwhelmed with emotion. For the past year, I have felt like I have just been falling into God's plans, and I am so grateful, but so out of control. I don't know about you, but I really like control, and especially over these last few weeks, I really would have liked to have some. But I didn't. The thing is though that God has blessed me with so many open doors, I am freaking the heck out actually. And then I laugh again because I know that is exactly where He wants me- dependent on Him.  All of these opportunities I have been blessed with are amazing, and I can't wait to see what happens with them all. However, I know it's about so much more than that. It's about Him. This man, He saved my life, and now He is letting me live my life for Him (even though 5 out of the 7 days a week I view it more as drowning).

The Easter Story is the greatest story ever told, but this year it is just hitting home like I have never felt before. I am being pushed to be vulnerable about why I love Jesus, why I want to celebrate his resurrection, why I am thankful for his resurrection. Guys, it's so simple. This man died for me, and He died for you. He planned this life for you. He loves you. He loves you so much He openly confessed it KNOWING that we would all turn away and reject Him at many points in our lives. That my friends is vulnerability, something that God is teaching me a lesson on right now.

Let's go with what is on my mind. Guys, emotions are the worst. I just have to say that as a girl, I hate having feelings, the idea of investing, and all that good stuff. Friendships, no problem. But the second I think I could have feelings for a guy, I freak the heck out. I don't like to be vulnerable, I don't like to feel stupid, and the risk is at stake for both of those things when it comes to telling someone how you feel. It's hard and usually embarrassing and full of fear. Even as I typed this, I laughed a little because who doesn't like to be flattered? Even if you tell someone that and the feelings aren't reciprocated, you probably still made that person's day. That is not the point I am trying to make though. When I think about this vulnerability in a relationship, I next think about Jesus and His willingness to be vulnerable. Think about if Jesus hadn't been vulnerable and transparent with us... what in the world would have gained from His teachings and example? What would we have seen? He loves us more than I could ever love anyone, and yet it was so easy for Him to say and show, and without it, what would Christianity stand on?  He came to earth to tell us and assure us of an eternity that we can't even imagine exists and that we were loved like no other by our Father in Heaven. That takes boldness and guts.  Talk about the vulnerability needed to tell His best bros that, His family... I don't know... again, just the blurbs on my mind this beautiful Easter Sunday.